Why People That Stare at Us Are Our Secret Ingredient!


I just sooooo love it when people stare! It’s as if the lead actress came waltzing into the theater where you are watching their film!

Who doesn’t love being stared at for their sexy orthotics and bad ass wheels? You can’t compete with our glamorous feeding pump bag! I mean that puppy is straight outta Covidian! You haven’t seen such a nondescript plain item be so expensive since Kanye’s $125 plain white shirt! We rock the look!

Try hard to not be jealous! My girl has serious swag for a nine-year old. She knows how to work the knee-high socks for shoes look and suction pump bag accessory bag! Woo!


You just can’t compete with the badass special needs families out there. It’s ok, we get it.We have doctors lined up to meet our every need! We have custom vehicles to get us to and fro. Hell, we even have our own driver!

Our diets are custom tailored, our clothes specific for our bodies, and you should totally be envious of our personal assistants! They even hold meetings on catering to our needs. Seeeeeeriously people! Feel free to stare at our awesomeness!


We never feel like animals in a cage at the zoo by the way you stare. No, we know you are eyeing our oxygen! Here’s a secret.

It’s not oxygen! It’s pure pixie dust and we can secretly fly! Don’t stop staring or you will miss it!

We don’t mind if you stand in front of us, because you clearly are applying for our bodyguard position, right? No worries about moving our chair, this is you showing us your superior driving talent! You have to have serious skills to be in our inner circle, desperate times call for desperate measures though! Next time just ask our assistant about possible position openings, ok?

When you park in that handicap spot, we are positive you are just holding it for us! After all, with a ride as sweet as ours, we need to be front and center!

Please don’t shush your questioning children, we never know where we will find talent to work with! That could be a future member of our team! If you can pass our litany of necessary skills of course! We know you didn’t invite us to that birthday party because we would hate to cause a stir with our very presence. Of course we never get lonely. That’s what our therapist is for!

Don’t stop staring, because otherwise we are simply invisible. Just so you know, we make awesome friends!





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